


Cornered

by Riona



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Consent Issues, M/M, not very explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:48:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27743251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Riona/pseuds/Riona
Summary: “I came here to proposition you sexually,” L says.Light stares at him, calculating.This is a test.
Relationships: L/Yagami Light
Comments: 12
Kudos: 101





	Cornered

“Light!” Light’s mother calls up the stairs. “Your friend is here!”

His friend? He wasn’t expecting anyone.

He double-checks that the Death Note is secured and leaves his room.

Everything in Light wants to freeze when he sees who it is. L, here, in the entrance to his home.

He suppresses any visible reaction. Carries on down the stairs, calmly. “Ryuzaki? I hadn’t realised you were coming.”

“I wanted to see you,” L says. “Is it an inconvenient time?”

Why is he here? L already sees Light at university and at the investigation headquarters; why would he need to visit him in private as well? Is L still gathering his suspicions, or is he beginning to close a net?

“It’s not a problem at all,” Light says. “It’s good to see you. Shall we go up to my room?”

-

Light takes a seat in his computer chair, within arm’s reach of the drawer where the Death Note is hidden. L sits hunched up on the bed, which Light feels is a little overfamiliar. By this point, though, Light has stopped wondering whether every little social misstep L makes is an effort to draw out Kira; he’s fairly certain that L is actually as socially obtuse as he seems.

Not that that means Light can let his guard down.

“You said you needed to see me?” Light asks.

L’s eyes are as dark and unreadable as ever. “I said I wanted to see you.”

Light’s known L long enough to know he doesn’t make casual social calls. He wouldn’t come here if he didn’t think it would benefit the investigation, any more than Light would go on a date without thinking it would benefit his own cause. “Oh?”

“I thought we might both need some stress relief,” L says. “This is a tense investigation.”

If Light agrees that it’s tense, is he admitting that he has a personal stake in the outcome? If he doesn’t agree, is he making it too clear that he doesn’t expect Kira to target him as part of the investigation team? He makes an ambiguous noise.

“I came here to proposition you sexually.”

“Whoa!” Ryuk exclaims from the corner of the room.

It’s so unexpected that Light laughs before he’s had time to consider the correct response. “What?”

_I came here to proposition you sexually?_ Who would phrase it like that?

“Why are you really here?” Light asks.

“I meant exactly what I said,” L says.

Light stares at him, calculating.

This is a test.

L pushes himself off the bed, gets to his feet. It only brings Light’s attention more sharply to the fact that he was on the bed in the first place. “If you ask me to leave, I’ll leave.”

Would Kira accept? Would he refuse?

Accepting would be putting himself into a dangerous situation. If he has sex with L, every action Light takes, every reaction he has will be scrutinised for evidence.

Which is exactly why he needs to accept. Kira would refuse in a heartbeat; it’s too risky. If he doesn’t want to be seen as Kira...

Light swallows. “I’m not going to ask you to leave.”

L pauses. “I didn’t know if you’d be interested.”

“You’re interesting.” That much is undeniably true.

L tilts his head, very slightly. “I’m glad to hear that.”

They look at each other in silence for a moment.

L’s made his approach in such a strange, clinical way. Expressing his intentions like a business proposal, making no effort to build an intimate scene beforehand. There’s no obvious way to proceed from here.

That’s probably L’s intention, of course. The perfect experimental conditions. He’s dropped Light into a sterile room and he’s waiting to see what he does.

Whether Light wants this didn’t really enter into the equation when he was considering L’s offer. The important thing is to take the action that seems least suspicious.

But he has to at least _seem_ like he wants it. If he’s apparently unenthusiastic, that will invite questions about why he accepted.

He has to be clear on the story in his head. Is he accepting because it’s an offer of sex, and the specific person offering isn’t particularly important? Or is he attracted to L in the story he’s telling?

He doesn’t like either option. He wants to be seen as someone of discerning taste, not someone who’d leap at an offer of sex in the indiscriminate pursuit of sex itself. That’s not what motivates him.

What motivates him, in sex and, by this point, in every aspect of his life, is keeping his plan on track.

Light has to act like he wants this. Which means he should make a move himself.

He stands and slides his fingers into the hair at the nape of L’s neck. L’s constant slouch doesn’t make this any easier; Light has to tilt L’s head up to kiss him.

He’s wondering, until the last instant, whether L will back down. Whether he’ll admit that this is just a test, that he doesn’t want Light. Or that he only wants Light in handcuffs, at least.

L doesn’t stop him. Light kisses him, something tightening in his stomach. If L didn’t stop him here, he isn’t _going_ to stop him. Test or no test, this ends in sex.

All Light can do is play this so it doesn’t also end in his arrest.

Who should be the one to break the kiss? Letting L do it would be the same as hesitating for too long, unable to decide on the safest course of action. It’ll look like he’s trying to evade suspicion.

Light pulls away. Gives Ryuk a significant look over L’s shoulder. Ryuk, of course, laughs and ignores it.

Light wasn’t expecting any request for privacy to be respected, of course. Privacy is a thing of the past for him; he’s had time to get used to that. But this in particular is new.

L already knows that Light is proud, that he likes to be in control. It wouldn’t be suspicious for Light to be the one to push L down onto the bed, to straddle him. Or... it might be suspicious, but passively waiting for L to take charge would be _more_ suspicious.

Light keeps his movements careful, controlled, without violence. But he makes it clear, in guiding L downwards, that he’s the one in charge here.

What a joke. He isn’t _choosing_ to take control. Whether it’s the choice he’d make naturally or not, he’s forced to choose whatever makes him seem less like Kira. He’s a puppet to L’s suspicions in every action he takes, and it rankles.

L never takes that unsettling gaze off him. Is there any real attraction there, or is this a sacrifice L is making for the sake of the investigation?

The thought bothers Light in ways he can’t pin down.

He kisses L again, so he doesn’t have to look at him.

-

“I was hoping you’d be rougher, Light-kun.”

Light’s breath catches.

Why would he say that? Is he saying he _knows_ Light is Kira, and that that’s why he’s being gentle? Is he saying Kira would be rougher, and he’s disappointed that Light’s actions don’t support his suspicions of Kira’s identity?

There’s an implied request to be less gentle there as well. How should he respond to that?

Kira would be aggressive in bed, would take advantage of the opportunity to gain some sort of power over L. Light knows that because it’s a temptation he’s been fighting this entire time. But Kira would also be in no hurry to fulfil L’s requests.

It feels like, no matter what he does, it only makes it more likely that he’s Kira. He can’t even find personal gratification in his choice; it’s too late for that. Any decision he makes will be influenced by what L just said. If he turns rougher to protect himself, it’s just another way for L to exert power over him.

He lets out an infuriated hiss through his teeth. At least he can blame that on the situation.

He has to be rougher. What else can he do? Claim that that’s not something he’s comfortable with? L will see through it.

He thinks about putting his hands around L’s throat. He thinks—

It crosses his mind: could he kill L here and now, with his own hands? He’s made no progress in learning L’s name, but there are other ways to kill. An accident during sex, _he asked me to be rougher, I didn’t think—_

Light’s father is biased, but he’s no fool. L openly suspects Light; if he dies at Light’s hands, that will raise questions. And Light can’t risk a manslaughter charge, potential imprisonment, being unable to write new names.

He’s still looking at L’s throat. His fingers twitch.

He bites into L’s shoulder instead.

-

Light’s breathing is shallow, his fingers digging under L’s protruding collarbone, and he’s _furious_ about it.

It’s probably safest this way. If he remains completely detached, if he has to feign pleasure, L might realise he’s feigning, and that would be dangerous. For his own safety, Light needs to get something physical out of this.

But he doesn’t _want_ to. There’s something so base, so _human_ about it. A god would toy with L from a distance, make him writhe and gasp without feeling anything itself.

All Light wants to feel in this situation is superiority and amusement. But he still has a human body, and it’s betrayed him.

He can’t let it cloud his judgement. He has to stay focused. He—

He comes too suddenly to think it through, and for a moment he can’t breathe. Was that a mistake?

Coming first is probably uncharacteristic of Kira, or so he prefers to think. Which means L might conclude that Light _knew_ it would be uncharacteristic of Kira and came first deliberately. It’s a calculated move that Kira might make. But, on this occasion, it was pure chance.

Light hates that the decision has been taken out of his hands. If he’s going to be caught, he wants it to be his own mistake. It shouldn’t be because of something out of his control. He’s gone to so much effort to control every aspect of his environment.

-

L watches him, analytical as ever, as Light bundles up the sheets. Perhaps it’s suspicious to move so quickly to cleanup. A desire to cleanse the world of criminals reflected in a desire to keep his environment clean in other ways. It’s too late now; it would be more suspicious to stop.

“What are your conclusions?” Light asks, keeping his voice light, as he dumps an armful of bedlinen into his laundry basket.

“My conclusions?” L asks.

“Am I Kira? Am I not Kira?” He’s established a history of checking on this; it wouldn’t necessarily be suspicious for him to ask again now. “You must have taken something from that.”

L smiles, very slightly. “That’s what you were thinking about?”

It’s the only thing he ever thinks about. He was thinking about it as he came; he’s thinking about it now. He dreams about trying to minimise suspicion, failing, getting caught. “It occurred to me.”

L looks at him for a long, uncomfortable moment. Ryuk is laughing quietly in the corner.

“My conclusion,” L says at last, “is that you should make a greater effort to enjoy the moment.”

Light forces a laugh. “That might be true.”

“Also, the probability that you’re Kira has risen by three percent.”


End file.
